KCDakar
11-05-2006, 01:34 AM
This was sent to me by a British BMW rider...
Tongue Placed Firmly In Cheek
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifIn an emergency, a drawstring from a Parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent mate.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifA bike on the road is worth two in the shed.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifRiding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever ride faster than your guardian angel can fly.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifWhen everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever trade luck for skill.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifBefore you laugh at someone's bike, look at your own!
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifIf you crash because of weather, your funeral will probably be held on a sunny day.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifI couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifA friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you're broken down.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifPeople are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifI remember when sex was safe and riding was dangerous.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifKeep your bike in good repair: Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifCatching a wasp in your goggles or bee down your shirt @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifIf you ride like there's no tomorrow - there won't be.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifEveryone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifGrey-haired riders don't get that way from pure luck.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifDon't lead the pack if you don't know where you're going.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifYoung riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifTorches are tubular metal containers kept in a pannier for the purpose of storing dead batteries!
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifPut an elastic band around the torch switch to stop it being turned on in transit.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifLife's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ............."Holy Sh*t"..........."what a ride!"
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifWhy is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a barbecue?
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifHealth is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifSome minds are like concrete - thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever play strip poker with a nudist, they have nothing to lose.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifMary had a little lamb, some white wine, and a salad
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifSalad is not food, but it is food for real food.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifSupport bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifFlatulence is nature's contribution to humour.
Tongue Placed Firmly In Cheek
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifIn an emergency, a drawstring from a Parka hood can be used to strangle a snoring tent mate.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifA bike on the road is worth two in the shed.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifRiding faster than everyone else only guarantees you'll ride alone.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever ride faster than your guardian angel can fly.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifWhen everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever trade luck for skill.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifBefore you laugh at someone's bike, look at your own!
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifIf you crash because of weather, your funeral will probably be held on a sunny day.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifI couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifA friend is someone who'll get out of bed at 2am to drive his pickup to the middle of nowhere to get you when you're broken down.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifPeople are like Motorcycles: each is customized a bit differently.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifI remember when sex was safe and riding was dangerous.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifKeep your bike in good repair: Motorcycle boots are NOT comfortable for walking.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifCatching a wasp in your goggles or bee down your shirt @ 70 mph can double your vocabulary.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifIf you ride like there's no tomorrow - there won't be.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifEveryone crashes. Some get back on. Some don't. Some can't.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifGrey-haired riders don't get that way from pure luck.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifDon't lead the pack if you don't know where you're going.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifYoung riders pick a destination and go... Old riders pick a direction and go.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifTorches are tubular metal containers kept in a pannier for the purpose of storing dead batteries!
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifPut an elastic band around the torch switch to stop it being turned on in transit.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifLife's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting ............."Holy Sh*t"..........."what a ride!"
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifWhy is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a barbecue?
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifHealth is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifSome minds are like concrete - thoroughly mixed up and permanently set.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever play strip poker with a nudist, they have nothing to lose.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifMary had a little lamb, some white wine, and a salad
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifSalad is not food, but it is food for real food.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifNever take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifSupport bacteria - they're the only culture some people have.
http://www.bmw-club.org.uk/~midland/_themes/bmw-club-archive/bluelogo2.gifFlatulence is nature's contribution to humour.